Monday, August 27, 2007

Rainy Days and Mondays

They don't get me down. In fact, I love rainy days. They are comforting in a way I really can't explain. It's so precious when it happens, so rare. As a person that grew up in the South "bad weather" was something that most people felt they just had to deal with. I was an odd one. I've always had this almost unusual affinity for water in general, rainshowers and thunderstorms in particular.

The rain which quickly turned into a light spectacular started around 1am this morning. I heard the rain and saw the lightning, the thunder was soon to follow. I got out of bed and opened the sliding glass door and just stood there enjoying the smell of rain and watching the fat rain drops plop on the patio. Soon the urge to go outside and "play in the rain" took over. I opened the screen door and went outside and sat on the patio in a chair and let the rain just soak me. I loved it. I found it so relaxing and invigorating.

It's not simply the water, but there is something that feels almost cleansing from a rainstorm. I wish for many more Rainy Day Mondays.

Monday, August 20, 2007

And the Survey Says....

I went to my cardiologist appointment this morning for my test results from my echocardiogram, ekg, ultrasound, chest x-ray and lab work. All my test results were great he found nothing abnormal. So basically I am a healthy fat chick with high blood pressure that I will always have to take medication for. The doctor told me to continue my medication, avoid high sodium, keep on dieting (I have lost 43 pounds) and limit my caffiene intake.

So, with the help of drugs, exercise and eating differently – the BP is down. I will have to spend some time at the gym instead of at the computer.  Just think, what if we could use our computers while on a treadmill or exercise bike? Nah, too much multi-tasking.

Sunday, August 19, 2007

Surrender

Sometimes in life we surrender to it. We accept what is as truth. We linger on it no more. Sometimes in life we stop. We make no further attempts. Messages are absorbed from skin to soul. We become silent in our understanding.

It is in the precise moment when that stillness comes that all chances are removed and we turn our eyes and hearts away. It is not out of anger or hate, but in simple surrender and acceptance of what is being asked, or not asked.

Life does not afford that a heart remain open forever; unclaimed. In all things, time waits for no man. This much I know as truth.

Saturday, August 11, 2007

Finally I Am Feeling Better

I have not gotten any test results back yet, but I have been eating as well as possible, drinking lots of fluids, and taking my medication religiously. Finally I feel a lot better, though not 100%.

Despite all of this, I have met the most wonderful man. He has been there with me every step of the way through all I have been going through the past few weeks. He is kind, caring, gentle and he can make me laugh even on the worst days.

We are taking things one day at at time and very slowly, if a relationship happens GREAT if not I have met a wonderful new friend.

Through this nightmare I have realized I am not alone.

Thank you all my friends for all your messages of support.