To My Valentine

I had vowed not to love again because I loved too much because I loved freely and gave freely to those who did not return that love. I had closed my heart to love, to sadness and sorrow to joy and laughter. I stayed, locked away in my safe place, unknowing, unfeeling unmoved by the beauty of the world that passed me by.

I walked alive but unseeing through life with a heart no longer beating. Then one day I found myself loving again, this time knowing what love should be. This love brings a oneness that has made me whole. It is a mysterious mystical love and I have resigned myself to the knowledge that few will understand it.

I will never stop listening to the voice of this love, but will walk through the mysteries to find it and embrace it with all that I have. There is joy and sadness with this love and there is comfort and caring It brings a rapture that fills my spirit and sings in my soul echoed by the sound of my beating heart.

My Darling Bruce you are my soulmate, my sweetheart, you are my dream come true, from now until the end of time I give my heart and soul to you. Happy Valentines Day Sweetheart.

Working for the Weekend

Just a quick note to let everyone know that I have gone back to work at my old office. I will be working graveyard with Monday and Tuesday nights off. I am responsible for the switchboard and the cleaning of the office. I am a night owl, I don't have to deal with other humans and it is mostly quiet at night so I have no complaints!

Bruce has purchased a plane ticket and will be here February 12-21! I am so excited that we will be spending the holiday for lovers together. Hell, I am just excited that I am going to be able to snuggle in his arms and look into his eyes. I have missed him so much. The holidays were terribly hard without him and me being so sick didn't help much either. I have lots planned while he is here, so many places and things I want to show him.

Have a good weekend everyone. I will be busy for most of it. Working at night and getting some well past due spring cleaning done around here during the day. Bruce would probably not want to use a shovel to get in the front door when he arrives.

No Resolutions

The new year is upon us. Every year we all do the same thing, we come up with new years resolutions and try to stick to them. I'm not big on resolutions. To me, they are only meant to be broken or forgotten about by the second week of January. However, I have come up with a few goals that I would like to achieve over the course of this next year.

1) Spend a lot more quality time with the man who holds my heart. Bruce, I love you so very much and look forward to spending the rest of our lives together.

2) Spend more quality time with my beautiful daughter. Jennifer, I am so very proud of the strong, independent, young woman you have become.

3) Find a job and work really hard to make a difference.

4) Get enrolled in the 23-week course I want to take so I can start taking control of my life, finances, and security.

5) Get my driver's license (again).

6) Continue attempting to live a healthy lifestyle and continue the weight loss I started in 2007. In 2007 I lost 50 pounds, my starting weight was 296. My current weight is 246. Hopefully, add exercise to my life.

Quote for the New Year: "If I can't make it through one door, I'll go through another door -- or I'll make a door. Something terrific will come no matter how dark the present seems"